Last week we had a power outage that plunged our whole neighbourhood into darkness for the entire night. As we had no electricity or gas, we could only use the light of flickering of candles to help us manoeuvre our way around in the pitch dark. The positive side of this minor disaster was that there was no TV, no R&B or rap music, no popping sounds from the Facebook chat, no computers or computer games. There was only the sound of the wind blowing through the trees outside and the opportunity to see a crescent moon silently rising in an indigo-coloured sky not veiled by the city lights. It made me acutely aware of how intrusive our world of technology can be. Fortunately, many families have the opportunity during the summer months to spend some time away from their habitual urban lives.
Last Spring I was delighted to watch two robins in my garden, a mother and father, who were busily planning and preparing for the birth of their offspring. They were building an elaborate nest in my garden shed in the back of one of my old cardboard storage boxes. I felt honoured that they chose my shed as their venue for starting a new family. Planning and preparing are actually two very important cognitive functions that make up a group of what we call executive functions (EF). These advanced mental tasks include strategising, organising, setting goals, and paying attention to the important details that will help us achieve those goals.
Recently I became a grandmother and was surprised as my friends complimented me on my beaming smile and aura of radiance. At first I was dumbfounded by this new state of being; having never really relished the thought of becoming a grandmother. It used to conjure up images of being old, and the premise that old age is not valued or respected in our western society. This appears to be true especially for women who try to hide their age, are ashamed of their wrinkles and loathe the thought of being called ‘Granny’. I sought out others who have had this identity of grandparent bestowed upon them and there was a common theme that filled our conversations...
Last week we looked at some examples of individuals who have given credit for their achievements to others who made an impact on their lives. Today we will focus on how we can help the children in our lives to keep their minds open as they build their future and develop their self-esteem.
Do you remember who it was that dramatically changed your views and sent you in a different direction on your inspired journey? Thinking back there may have been one or two people or a handful, if you are lucky, who changed your life. Perhaps it started in childhood when someone took an interest in you and uplifted you in a way that it made a huge difference in how you viewed yourself and your own potential. In fact, that person believed in you when no one else ever thought of doing so. This had a life changing knock-on effect which set off an astounding chain of events, perhaps influencing you to discover your particular career path or life purpose.
A few weeks ago I went to a conference in California and met up with a colleague, Dr Pilar Placone, who I had not seen in over 20 years. After all these years it was delightful to discover that we had so much in common. In our clinical practice we resonated with similar interests in neuroscience and therapeutic approaches; especially parent-child attachment therapy and mindfulness. I felt very privileged to have been invited to one of Dr Placone’s parent classes. I watched how her program helped guide parents to a more connected state within themselves which created a deeper connection, a "felt sense" within their child. Mindfulness is a way of observing thoughts, feelings and sensory input in the present moment without reacting, distracting, or escaping from them, but rather learning to accept them in a non-judgemental way. The following article written by Pilar is about how the simple, yet powerful act of smiling can reduce stress and enhance the parent-child bond (no matter how old your child is)...
What does generosity mean to you? We all love someone who is a generous person and are repelled by someone who is selfish or stingy. Often a person’s giving nature has little to do with anything of material value but more to do with their attitude and generosity of spirit. We feel the generosity of others when they come to us with a relaxed presence. Their facial expressions and body language make us feel valued and comfortable just being with them. When they speak, there is a gentle quality that relaxes the psychological barriers between people. It is easy to be around this kind of person, easy to open up and we often desire to be more like them.
Staying focused is necessary in whatever we are doing in order to do the best job we can do. We must prepare for any activity or project by focusing clearly in our minds and our bodies. Leaders in government and large organizations often have a very difficult time because they don’t have the luxury to focus only on one problem at a time. As parents, we have the same kind of problems on a smaller scale. We have many responsibilities to consider: our homes, our spouses, our children, our jobs, our bills, our health, our friends, etc. Because of our busy lives there are so many distractions that often we are only present in body, when our wish really is to be fully present with our whole self especially when spending time with our children and others who are important to us.
Have you reflected and pondered over the past year? If so, what was your greatest source of inspiration? We asked some colleagues and readers the following question: Who inspired you the most in 2009? Here are some of the responses received.
You have probably heard the idiom “He/she got up on the wrong side of the bed.” This expression originates from the ancient superstition that it was bad luck to put one's left foot down first when getting out of bed. Today it simply means a person who woke up in a lousy or grumpy mood, started their day on the “wrong foot”, and in turn, it negatively affected what happened that day. The start-of-the day mood actually has a profound influence on the essence of your day. How do you spend the beginning of your day?